


Better That We Break

by zebraljb



Series: Tumblr Prompts [19]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Breaking Up & Making Up, M/M, Self-Doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 07:33:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25347022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zebraljb/pseuds/zebraljb
Summary: Harry breaks up with Eggsy because it's the right thing to do. Eggsy deserves more.It's not the right thing to do, Harry realizes.
Relationships: Harry Hart | Galahad/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Series: Tumblr Prompts [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1598944
Comments: 20
Kudos: 182





	Better That We Break

**Author's Note:**

> I requested fluffy Hartwin prompts, and an anonymous friend gave me this:
> 
> Harry is feeling self conscious about his relationship with Eggsy (too old, broken etc) then he overhears Eggsy talking to his mates who are all saying how awesome he is and how lucky Eggsy is. Estates raised they see things differently.
> 
> I'm in a bit of a lonely place right now, so unfortunately it's not quite fluffy, but it gets there at the end.
> 
> Title and lyric from the Maroon 5 song "Better That We Break," one of my favorite songs of theirs. Check it out.
> 
> Teen & up for language only.

_I never heard perfection til/I heard you speak, and now it kills me/just to you hear you say the simple things/now waking up is hard to do/and sleeping's impossible too/everything's reminding me of you..._

Harry rubs the sleep from his eyes, stretches, and slowly sits up. His hand reaches over to the other side, almost on impulse. The empty side. It’s empty. Because Harry did the right thing. He swings his legs over the side of the bed and slides into his slippers. Sometimes there’s a cup of tea cooling on his nightstand. But not this morning, because Harry did the right thing.

He pads into the en suite and turns on the light. There is only one toothbrush in the holder, one shaving kit on the counter. Because Harry did the right thing. He looks at his reflection in the mirror but doesn’t see it. He sees Eggsy’s face go from pleased to horrified, because Harry was saying all the right things.

_“I just think it’s probably wise if we stop things before they go much further.” Harry toyed with a button on his cardigan._

_“We been together for a year, living together for six months. How much further can things go?” Eggsy asked tightly. “Other than marriage, and I told you I ain’t interested in that. Don’t need a piece of paper and a ring to know how much I love you. And how much you love me.” Eggsy tilted his head and studied Harry curiously. “You do love me, right, Harry?”_

_“I do, with all my heart. But you are not even thirty.”_

_“Twenty-seven, close enough,” Eggsy interrupted. Harry chose to ignore the pained whine in his voice._

_“I am fifty-one. If I’m no over the hill, I’m nearing the crest. You have your whole life in front of you and I do not wish to stand in your way.”_

_“Stand in my way? In the way of what, exactly, Harry? My happily ever after?” Eggsy’s knuckles were white as they gripped the back of the kitchen chair._

_“You think that now, but I am not the man I used to be. I am weak. I have bad days where I limp, horrible days where the headaches are so mind-numbing I cannot see. When YOU are fifty-one, I’ll be seventy-five.”_

_“And a fit silver fox. So what if you end up in a wheelchair? I’ll have toned arms from pushing you around.” Eggsy smiled weakly at his own joke. “Harry, what are you saying?”_

_“I’m saying that we should…that it’s in our best interests to…”_

_“You’re breaking up with me. Say it.”_

_“That sounds quite juvenile.”_

_“Yeah, well, you’re sounding quite juvenile right about now.” Eggsy’s shock slowly morphed into anger._

_“I am breaking up with you so you can have a better life. You’ll thank me eventually…it’s the right thing to do.”_

_Eggsy stared at him as one tear escapes his green eyes. “Since when have I ever done the right thing, Harry?” Harry opened his mouth. “Don’t. Just…don’t. I’ll go to Mum’s tonight, she’ll let me stay there until I can get settled. She’ll love serving me a healthy dose of ‘I told you so.’ She always said you’d break my heart. Never thought she’d end up right.” He got his keys from their hook and his jacket from the back of a chair. “I’ll be by tomorrow to get some of my things.”_

And then, after doing the right thing, Harry watched his heart walk out the door.

“Ye better have a damn good reason for breaking into my office, whoever ye are,” Merlin says angrily as he storms through the door. He stares at Harry in shock. “Harry?”

“In the flesh. Tea?” Harry asks brightly. He goes to the sideboard before Merlin can reply.

Merlin stows his things in his desk and turns on his equipment. “Thank ye.” He leans against his desk and continues to look at Harry as if he’s grown another head. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“It’s England. We drink tea whenever we’re not drinking alcohol.” Harry prepares the cup to Merlin’s exact specifications and hands it over.

“I meant why are you in my office before I am. It’s half-seven.”

“Yes, well, I’ve turned over a new leaf.”

“A new leaf.” Merlin immediately sits down and taps at a few keys. “Well, your vitals are normal, although your blood pressure is a bit higher than I’m used to seeing.”

“A new leaf can be exciting.”

“It can.” Some sort of red light blinks in the corner of a monitor and Merlin clicks on it. An interoffice message opens and Harry politely looks away. “A new leaf, ye say?”

“Yes. I changed Kingsman when I became Arthur, and now perhaps it’s time for Arthur to change as well.”

“Does this change have anything to do with Galahad messaging me and informing me he will not be in today, followed by a request for a list of available Kingsman flats?” Merlin’s eyes bore into Harry. “He left ye?”

“No. He…we…it was decided that we terminate our relationship.”

“Decided by whom?”

Harry studies his tea. “It was the right thing to do.”

“Fucking hell, Harry.” Merlin leans back in his chair. “You broke up with him?”

“That sounds ridiculous.”

“You ARE ridiculous!” Merlin almost shouts. “That boy is the best thing that’s ever happened to ye! He all but worships the ground ye walk on. When the others voted ye in as Arthur, he looked so proud it was as if he was YOUR mentor. He’d take a fucking bullet for ye, Harry.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” Harry snarls. 

“That boy is everything ye could want in a partner. Smart, strong, caring.”

“I know! And that is why he needs to be free of me!” Harry blurts out. Merlin gapes at him. “I’m old and broken, too broken to mend. The headaches are getting more frequent. I’m tired every day. The doctors don’t know…the chances of me having a stroke someday are higher than normal.” Harry rubs along the eyepatch. “He is far too young to become my caretaker. He deserves a LIFE.”

“Nae, Harry, he deserves to be happy, and for some ridiculous reason he feels you’re the man to make him happy and KEEP him happy.”

“I have nothing to offer. Not compared to what I will end up taking from him. He…” Harry shakes his head.

“Harry, if ye were anyone else, and I didn’t think it would give you a brain aneurysm, I would punch ye in the face for hurting my good friend,” Merlin says quietly. “Because I know he is probably hurting. If ye think YOU are upset, I’m sure he’s feeling it ten times over. But because you’re my best friend, I will only say this. Eggsy has a will of iron. If he saw what was happening and decided it wasn’t what he wanted, he would have said goodbye long ago.”

“I wanted to do it before it got to that point. Save him the trouble,” Harry whispers. 

“You are a fucking idiot,” Merlin says. He responds to Eggsy’s message and closes the window. “Now. Let’s talk about Percival and Cairo.”

Harry makes it through that day and the next. The house is full of Eggsy’s absence and it presses on Harry like something he can actually reach out and touch. He idly thinks about packing Eggsy’s things for him but the thought of touching something that invokes Eggsy’s presence makes him actually ill. He stays at the manor so late the second day that he actually sleeps in his suite, a set of room he’s only used on special occasions. Like their first anniversary.

_“You look beautiful in red,” Harry had whispered as he laid Eggsy down on the wine red duvet. “Like royalty.”_

_“Like the royal harlot, probably,” Eggsy snickered. “I live to serve the king.” He winked at Harry, slid down Harry’s naked body, and before Harry knew it his cock was in Eggsy’s warm and talented mouth._

“Go home!” Merlin roars on the third day when he finds Harry in his office yet again. “I swear to God, Harry, I will round up the knights, make up a delicious lie with an exorbitant amount of background, and get them to kick ye off your throne, don’t think I won’t.”

“I hate home,” Harry whispers.

Merlin loses about 18% of his steam. “I’m sorry, Harry. But get your arse out of my office!”

“I’m sorry,” Harry says. He stands up straight, gives Merlin a bit of a bow, and returns to his own office. 

He sits in Arthur’s chair, looks at Arthur’s emails, and thinks about Galahad. After about two hours he gives up and closes everything down. He stops by his assistant’s office and explains he is feeling a bit under the weather and will be at home for the rest of the day if she would need him.

The train and cab rides go by in a blur, and he’s actually surprised when he finds himself going up the pavement to his front door. He slowly unlocks it, closes the door with a gentle click, and leans against it with his eyes closed. 

Harry’s eyes fly open when he hears voices. Men’s voices, in his living room. He reaches under his coat and easily palms one of his revolvers. Arthur isn’t technically required to be armed at all times, but Harry considers it a personal requirement. He slides out of his shoes and tiptoes down the hall toward the voices.

“Oi, mate, you even read all these books?” A voice says with a laugh. Harry knows that voice.

“They ain’t mine,” Eggsy says tiredly and Harry freezes. “I’m just going through these dvds and stuff. Get the Xbox packed up, will you, Jamal? Here’s a box.”

“Wow…look at all these.” Harry hears hard plastic slapping about. “Call of Duty Modern Warfare, Borderlands Three, Saints Row, Assassins Creed…”

“Bloke at the game shop loves Harry…anything he says is good Harry buys for me,” Eggsy says. “Don’t even need to ask no more.”

“Must be nice to have a Sugar Daddy.” Ryan. Harry knows that voice too.”

“He ain’t my Sugar Daddy,” Eggsy says, and Harry can hear the clenching of his teeth.

“I know, bruv. Harry’s aces,” Ryan replies. “Wish I had a Harry.”

“Uh, Ryan?” Jamal says.

“Not like that. I mean someone that’s into me like that. He’s over the fucking moon for you, Eggsy. Can see it all the time.”

“You’ve met him three times. Quit yapping and get to packing,” Eggsy orders. He sniffles a bit.

“Yeah, but every time I met him, he was like…” Ryan flounders a bit.

“I get it,” Jamal pipes up. “You two came into the pub, and it was fucking obvious Harry didn’t belong there, but he didn’t seem to get that. He was just like one of us. Ordered a pint, paid for his round, offered to pay for more but didn’t get an attitude when we said we took turns.”

“Didn’t hold out your chair for you, but he might as well have,” Ryan adds. “He waited for you to sit before he sat. He wiped the table in front of you. He let you run the show, your friends after all, but the whole time he was just watching you. He had like cartoon hearts in his eyes.”

“Shut up,” Eggsy mumbles. Harry leans against the wall and closes his eyes.

“And when you left the table to use the loo, he watched you walk away, and it was like he was itching til you got back. Talked about everything you’re doing at that tailor shop, how everyone loves you and he’s so proud of you and what you’ve learned.”

“When we was all gonna go to that footie match and you got sick and couldn’t come, he still gave us the tickets. Just because we was your mates,” Jamal continues. Harry remembers that day well. Eggsy wasn’t ill. He was recovering from a six day mission in Crete. 

“And when you talk about Dean? Fuck, Harry looks evil,” Ryan says. “You can tell if he ever had the chance to get his hands on that bastard, he’d tear him into pieces.”

“Harry loves me,” Eggsy says quietly. “He just…he isn’t right for me, I guess.”

“The fuck he isn’t,” Jamal almost snarls. “Eggsy, why you letting him break it off? You need to fight for him. Not a lot of people who can love like that. And he loves you. Know it sounds weird for me to say, but he does. He’s the kinda bloke who will let you fall apart if you gotta fall apart, cuz he’s gonna do his damndest to put you back together again. Harry will always have your back.”

“He doesn’t have my back now, and he’s the one breaking me into pieces,” Eggsy blurts out. “He thinks I can do better.”

“There ain’t no one better for Eggsy Unwin than Harry Hart,” Jamal says.

“Too fucking right,” Ryan adds.

Harry wipes at his face and decides it’s about time to make his presence known. He clears his throat, stomps his feet a bit, and turns into the entrance of the living room. “Hello, gentlemen.”

“Harry!” Eggsy jumps to his feet. “I was, uh, packing stuff. Thought you’d be at work all day.”

“I wasn’t feeling well and decided to take the day off,” Harry replies. 

Eggsy looks tired, broken. Harry did this to him. “Izzit your head? Your leg? Don’t forget, Doc said…” Eggsy stops. “Sorry. Guess it ain’t my place to worry no more.”

“No, it isn’t my head or my leg. It’s my heart. Apparently I felt the need to break a piece of it off and send it out the door to its mother’s,” Harry says. He looks at Jamal and Ryan. “I wish to thank you, boys. I heard what you said…I appreciate your support and kind words.”

“Just don’t tell anyone,” Ryan mumbles. Jamal elbows him.

“Would it be too much trouble for me to ask you to leave?” Harry continues. “I know it’s rude of me, but I believe Eggsy and I need to have a talk.”

“Sure, bruv, we’ll call a cab,” Jamal says. “See you, Eggsy.”

“Yeah,” Eggsy says faintly, giving Harry a confused look.

Harry waits until the front door closes. “I seem to have made a horrible mistake.”

“You think?” 

“I could only see my faults, see the way I could possibly hurt you. I didn’t realize…I didn’t know…I couldn’t see everything I had to offer, apparently.” Harry fidgets a bit. “I love you with every part of my being, Eggsy. When you’re not here, it’s like the sun dims just a little. But I was afraid of dimming YOUR sun, taking away part of what makes you shine so bright. My future is so uncertain, and I did not want to drag you down a path that could eventually hurt you.”

“Harry, you’re two decades older than I am. I knew that no matter what, you would start to age. It’s called life.” Eggsy walks over to him. “And I accepted that. I’m in this for a long haul, and I thought you were too.”

“I was. I AM,” Harry insists. “I just hit a tremendous road block in the shape of my own self-doubt. I don’t want to do anything to make your life difficult.”

“Harry, you made my life difficult the day we met,” Eggsy says with a slow grin. 

“Jamal and Ryan…they said some amazing things about me.” Harry takes Eggsy’s hands in his. “I never saw it that way.”

“You gotta remember where we come from, Harry. Men don’t hold out chairs or cover the tab or go out of their way for a friend. At least not very often. And you did all that without thought…for me.” Eggsy looks up at him and leans in like a flower toward the sun. “Because you love me.”

“I love you.”

“Forever.”

“Until my last breath.”

“You still breaking up with me?” Eggsy stands on tiptoe until his mouth is centimeters from Harry’s.

“I would like to rescind the complete and utter rubbish I spouted a few days ago.” Harry kisses him long and hard. “Because I love you. I love everything about you. And I cannot bear one more day of a life without you in it.”

“Finally got your head out of your arse.” Eggsy smiles and kisses him again. “I forgive you.”

“I love you.”

Eggsy takes Harry by the hand and leads him to the sofa, where he straddles Harry’s lap and buries his head in Harry’s neck. “Don’t ever do that to me again, Harry. Felt like a part of me was cut out.”

“Never again,” Harry promises, and kisses his perfect boy.

Which is the right thing to do.


End file.
